Thursday, February 16, 2012

Big Flubs at Firehouse Subs (Food Views)

Sunday 02/12/12 (Afternoon)
7770 Dudley Dr. West Chester, OH. 45069

I heard good things about FIREHOUSE SUBS but all of that quickly began disintegrating just after a few steps inside their establishment. Skepticism hit me hard from the get-go. This place boasted in their door how it was founded by firefighters... So what? Big fucking whoop! Trying to tug on the heart-strings There a bit? Nothing makes Americans eat more than guilt and/or pride. Right? Maybily so because the place was packed... Lots of people in there chowing down with only a few seating choices left. Good sign? Usually, but this time the sense of crowding felt like it was from poor design (everybody seem to be sitting right on top of each other). A couple strategically placed TVs had THE BIG GAME™ (basketball form) on, rather LOUDLY too... There was an immediate sense of urgency, uneasiness and good old fashioned stress that led to a family wide discomfort that would exist until the experiences finish.

The staff seemed disinterested and were running through the motions on automatic. Overworked and under appreciated maybe? I know Ive been there myself but there is a time and place, and more importantly, a TARGET for such behavior: the boss and/or manager not the guy who has chosen to try something new with his family. We were new to the FIREHOUSE SUBS and were vocal and upfront about it. The cashier actually rolled his eyes while we asked him a couple 'lead-in' questions about the place...  I found their menu on the wall a busy mess and their paper brochure menu's a bit confusing. We each ordered a 'combo' and were left at the end of our ordering not really too sure what exactly constituted a combo. "So we just grab our chips? Uh.... Oh... ok" We were expected to know that we were to get our chips, Olives brownie, wait for our name to be called and then raise our hand so our sandwiches could be shuttled to us...

Hmmm. 'Labored.'

I got a meatball sub combo (on wheat) warm but not exactly exhibiting the characteristics of being toasted.. It tasted good. As good as the same thing from SUBWAY I suppose, but my sub almost instantly fell apart when I took my first bite. If that had happened because it was so big with bunches of stuffs and such, it wouldn't have been a bad thing. I would have proudly brandished a fork and felt better about taking up the physical challenge of over portioned servings (in fact, I prefer it)... but it fell apart because of poor quality and construction. My sub was not made from a place of pride or respect. My sub was not made with love and qualitus ingredients. It was made because it was ordered, an obligation. An obligation to BARELY fill a request... Or so it felt that way. Why would I get a sub that's actually a bit lesser of a product than an equivalent to a SUBWAY offering for more money? I wanted something BETTER than I  could get somewhere else... At least something different. If  I was going to pay PENN STATION or QUIZNOS prices then it had to be equal, or greater than a $5 foot long! If I was to wait out the meatball delivery  truck to FIREHOUSE SUBS I would bet $5 that the same service supplies both. I really wanted to be impressed, but I wasn't. Doritos as part of my combo deal? Really? I could get Doritos at Subway, Quiznos and I think at Penn Station too. Honestly, I could spend what I spent at FIREHOUSE SUBS on a store bought meal and NOT have Doritos and eat better (actually for less too). Julies meatball subs are way better with a follow-up promise (beautiful threat) of spaghetti AND meatballs the next day! Now THAT'S something. Ultimately, FIREHOUSE SUBS just didn't have much to offer me. I can see that now... Yeah, 'now'


Julie got an Italian Sub. She ended up liking her sub much more than I liked mine (but would agree with many of my points within this article). Olive got a grilled cheese and was excited to get a kids fireman's hat and not as bothered to be eating fucking Doritos as part of a MEAL as I was,but another disappointment was something else I heard fabulous things about.. The Coca Cola 'Freestyle' fountain drink machine...

Double sheesh.

This machine boast over 100 drink choices of Coke products and flavorings and is suppose to revolutionize fountain drinks at restaurants... It was in need of servicing as I attempted my FIRST drink fetching and refuse to dispense soda. If you know me then you know that I can put away some pop... I was actually mad when I couldn't fill up my drink and already began to eat my fucking Doritos while waiting for my soon to arrive terribly mediocre sub. My sub choice arrived and already fell apart in all its mediocrity and I got a fork all before my first fill up.

Yeah, 100 flavors to choose from but I get regular Coke (Shawn Abnoxious

My first refill, I decided to try a Orange flavored Coke. Better than what I had, but still not verily good. Not something I would recommend... not something I would readily choose again (either). This could have been, at least a three refill type of meal (with the third refill being a take-away/walking refill) but there were no further refills. That's saying something strongly worth mentioning...

All of the above coupled with the fact that the whole place felt genuinely dirty with the floors in terrible need of sweeping, tables in need of a good wiping off and the staff appearing unmotivated, labored and disinterested in the bare minimums of restaurant enthusiasm...  It all equals an unappealing environment. At one point I felt  like the lackluster cashier who originally took our order was trying to start a good olde tyme stare-down with me! Really? Cant a guy drink terrible soda and eat a overpriced fall-apart sub with a fork and eat some fucking Doritos with his family while The Big Game™ blares in the background, without further battles? Makes be feel generous in barely awarding this place a rating 2/5.

I did my part of the bargain. I brought my family, my wallet, my interest and my appetite... I left with disappointment, plans to pick up a little something more at the grocery store and a fireman's hat for Olive who I told to take care of real good and make it last because we wont be going back for a long, long time...

If your wondering, my Kroger's store brand microwave French Bread Pizzas washed down with Big K brand soda really hit the spot even if I felt verily little guilt during its ingesting.